5) Stay humble, and especially no #Humblebrag.

We all know that guy who thinks he’s God’s gift to women. He thinks he’s the hottest, most amazing thing on the face of the planet and that he can have any tail he likes. But this type of cocky fellow becomes a particularly nasty shade of ugly when his object of desire isn’t just women, but Asian women in particular. One look at the now-defunct Creepy White Guys tumblr revealed a treasure trove of creepy mouthbreathers who are SO confident and cocky about getting Asian women, they forget how to actually woo a woman. It’s full of men bragging about everything from their fat wallets to their fat dicks, but another glance at the commentary on the same tumblr just goes to show how much Asian women hate it when guys get overconfident about nabbing that sweet Oriental ladyflesh. DON’T act like she’s a carnival prize you’re sure to win. DO remember that you’re not entitled to anything. Nobody likes it when a guy acts superior and douchetastic.

From the “Creepy White Guys” tumblr.

6) Don’t mock my culture or pretend to speak in my accent, you douchebag.

Asian men know this one already because they usually share the same culture as the Asian lady they pursue, but for the rest of you interested in getting in on the wonders of interracial dating, the number one cardinal rule is to NOT treat her culture like a zoo attraction. If you’re dating a Chinese woman, for example, feel free to learn about Chinese New Year so you can participate with her and her family. But don’t assume it’s suddenly cool and acceptable to start wearing traditional Chinese clothing out on dates with her like it’s some fancy costume party. You wouldn’t wear blackface around an African-American woman, would you? That’s not called cultural appreciation, that’s called being an asshole.

7) Meet me through friends.

The best way to meet your potential boyfriend or girlfriend is through other people. Not at a club (those are for one night stands).

And if you want to date more Asian women, you need to know more Asian women. There are two major truths in the dating world: women like seeing men who know how to behave around other women, and it’s not uncommon for people to hook their friends up. You need to know more women in order to know how to TREAT women, and you need to know more Asian women in order to know how to treat them. Trust me, Sandy Chu is going to be the first person to point out that your first date is going to crash and burn when you show up with a set of commemorative chopsticks instead of a bouquet of flowers.

But furthermore, nobody will be impressed if your social circle is exclusively comprised of Asian women—that fetish shit gets old FAST—but the more Asian women you know, the better your chances of meeting her hot sister or friend. It’s called seeing and being seen.

8) Don’t be desperate.

The sick Asian porn fantasies, cocky and entitled behavior, and treating her like a zoo attraction all have one thing in common that every female everywhere hates: they make you look insanely desperate. No woman wants to date a guy who is desperate; no Asian woman wants to date a guy who is desperate for Asian women. But why do women hate desperate men? Because it makes us think you’re not actually interested in us as women, you’re just interested in getting laid and you’ll take what you can get. Obsessing over Asian women only tells Asian women one thing: that they don’t actually exist as people and if they date you, they’re signing themselves up for life as your accessory.