7 Tips for Getting a Worthy Girlfriend

You’ve tried the rest now get the BEST! Use these 7 tips to find yourself a keeper!

Ask any dating guru or advice columnist what their number one question is from lonely men, and they’ll tell you that they are asked on a daily basis how to get a girlfriend. We can understand the desire. You want a perfect girl who laughs at all your jokes and makes chicken soup for you when you’re sick. You’re tired of going to bars and clubs on the weekend, and you’d love to have the luxury of a pretty lady who can just relax on the couch on Friday night.

But that strong desire for female companionship can easily slip into desperation that lands you with any old girl instead of the PERFECT girl.

I don’t know about you, but just settling for the first girl who comes along doesn’t sound very appealing. Every man deserves better than that, so if you want the PERFECT girl for you, here are seven foolproof tips for finding (and getting!) worthy women.

1) Learn to speak up, but more importantly, learn to listen.

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it 1000 times: if you can’t learn to talk to a girl, you’re never going to find a girl. Start small by practicing your conversation skills with everyone you meet, including the cashier at Wal-Mart, and eventually you’ll be able to hold a conversation with anyone, anywhere. But knowing how to give good conversation means nothing if you can’t listen to what a girl has to say. Every girl wants to feel noticed, interesting, and worthwhile, but if she feels like you’re not listening to her, she’s going to feel like you’ve got no real interest in her. Don’t feel afraid to comment on what she says, ask questions about it, or bring it up later. She will appreciate that you listened.

2) Pick the right target.

If you’re an outdoorsy type of guy, don’t go for the girl who prefers to play video games all day. If you prefer video games, don’t go for the girl who is a bodybuilder. You two will be miserable together. But more important than picking a girl who shares your interests is picking a girl who is even relationship material at all. You have to go where the quality women are if that’s what you want to meet. If all you’re doing is checking out clubs and after-hours parties, all you’re going to meet are club girls. They might be temporary fun, but when it comes to long-term relationship success, these girls rarely pan out.

3) Be clear about who you are and what you want in a girl.

It’s tempting to lie through your teeth and make a girl believe you’re a bear wrestling lion tamer who jumps flaming motorcycles over the Grand Canyon while doing brain surgery on infant children, if you can get away with it. But the only thing this will accomplish is attracting the wrong kind of girl and repelling the right one. Once a girl discovers the real you, she might lose interest, so BE the real you from the start and you’ll thank yourself later. If you want to attract a worthy girl, you have to be a worthy man first.

4) Don’t be afraid to just be friends.

Birds of a feather flock together. The girl of your dreams is probably friends with girls who are just like her. If you meet a girl who is Michelangelo’s rendition of your dream lady and yet she’s married or otherwise spoken for, don’t fret. She probably has a friend (or lots of friends) who is like a sister to her, and you two having a mutual friend earns you instant brownie points. Not only will you have pre-approval from her friends, you’ll also gain more experience in how to talk to women simply by having more female friends.

5) Don’t judge a book by its cover.

I’ve seen it time and time again. A guy sees a pretty girl, but takes one look at her and says she’s not his type, so he’s not going to waste his time approaching her. But do you know what that is? An excuse. Not everyone paints a clear picture of themselves on the outside. Some of the most straighlaced librarians are naughtier than Sasha Gray. The girl with the purple hair and tattoos probably volunteers at the homeless shelter. There’s even a Victoria’s Secret model who writes computer code and designs apps. My rule of thumb is simple: if she’s attractive, approach her. No excuses. You’ll never know what she’s like until you talk to her, and at the very least you made a new friend.

6) Approach her like a gentleman.

Nobody wants to admit that they met online or in a bar. Every woman has romantic fantasies about the knight in shining armor who glides up on a white horse and sweeps her off her feet. The reality is that this is never going to happen. We can’t all be Fabio. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t give her an incredible story to tell the girls about that dashing and debonair fellow who came up to her out of nowhere and told her she was beautiful (it works, unless you scream it at her). Women on websites and in clubs often feel harassed by desperate, horny men, so don’t be that guy. You’ll have the element of surprise to your advantage, and you’ll probably be one of the only men who has approached her like that.

7) Date multiple women.

I know what you’re thinking—why would I want to date multiple women if I’m looking for THE ONE? If you’ve found the girl of your dreams, great for you, high five! Commit to that girl. But if you haven’t found the right girl yet, then not dating multiple women has two potential problems: you are restricting your chances, and you run the risk of trapping yourself. The more women you date, the better your chances are of finding your dream lady. But dating multiple women also protects you from settling down too soon. When your focus is on only one female, the temptation to fall prey to puppy love and get trapped is strong, but when you date around until you find your ideal girl, there’s much less risk. Just don’t mislead any of the women into thinking you’re exclusive when you’re not, and don’t continue to date multiple women after you’ve found your dream woman.

Written by Cindy Young