Steven Lin is an Asian dating consultant based in New York City.

It’s common to hear Asian men complain that Asian women prefer White men, or that certain girls only date White men. This topic has been debated on for years, and my article will not prove things one way or the other. However, I do have some logical arguments for why I believe that the vast majority of Asian women actually DO NOT prefer White men (although they would be OPEN to dating White men).

Let’s first understand male / female dynamics. In general it is the man who pursues, and the woman receives the pursuit. 

Because it is the man’s job to target the woman, he can choose which pool he goes after. For Asian men, it’s generally much easier for them to date within their race, whether it be because of social circles, familial responsibility, comfortability, or just ease, so they mainly choose Asian women.

Asian women on the other hand, have to receive the pursuit. So if they have 100 suitors, statistically speaking they will have 94 non-Asian suitors, and 6 Asian suitors in the United States. Now this is skewed in certain areas where Asians are in enclaves, but there’s also plenty of areas in the US where there’s also very few Asians, which can skew it the other way.

Statistically speaking, the Asian woman is going to have a better choice of mate amongst the non-Asian men. 

So the fact that there is an out-marriage rate of only 36% instead of 94% shows there’s a strong correlation that Asian women prefer to marry Asian men.

If you look at Latina female outmarriage rates, it’s roughly 28%. However, Latinos comprise 17% of the US. Three times more than Asians. So the hit-rate of a Latino / Latino couple is statistically 3x higher than an Asian / Asian couple, yet the percentage difference in outmarriage is only 8%.

With that being said, there are going to be a percentage of women (not just Asian) that do prefer to date White / Black / Latino men. Whether this is because she’s racist against her own race, whether she’s brainwashed by society, or she just hasn’t found good men to date of her own race.

But this also doesn’t mean that she will exclusively date White men. Just like for some men, they may have a preference for large breasts. But like a man who has a preference for large breasts, a woman can overlook this preference if other criteria are met. Also a great number of women who have exclusively dated White men just haven’t even met enough Asian men.

The conclusion is this. Humans are evolutionary creatures. We do mate based on certain desirable traits. It’s just that there’s not enough of Asian men in the States. Therefore, it’s not that Asian women prefer White men, it’s just that they prefer to date the man with the better and more desirable traits.

So what does this mean for Asian men?

First of all, stop complaining. There are going to be Asian female, White male couples. Just like there will be some Asian male, White female couples (rising numbers in fact). By complaining, you are declaring yourself weaker or inferior to someone who is White. Stop this thinking.

You need to instead, decide how you can improve yourself. More game. More guts. More wealth even. You need to learn how to connect with a woman, to create deeper attraction. Instead, most of you are simply saying, “I Give Up! White guys are always going to be better than me.” Don’t do this.

Written by Steven Lin